Friendship
One of the most important things in my life is my friends. Friendship has been a major topic of my thoughts lately. You see, I moved thousands of miles away from home a few months ago. Away from my family and friends. Before I moved I thought, "I'm sure I'll make friends. With my job or with church or something...." Turns out making friends at the age of 22 is A LOT harder than it was at 5.
It took my about 3 months to get a job, because of a glitch in the school district's system which put me in as a sub nurse... yeah, no. Being a sub is like being traveling sales man or a tumbling weed or a sorority girl strung out on one night stands. You're never in one place long enough to get to know someone. I've met some really nice people and some really great teachers, the problem with subbing is that you never really see the teacher, you're just pen pals for a day. I've done a few repeat sub jobs... but once again, you never really get to know the teacher.
The ward Mark and I moved into is really awesome. We felt super welcome and people were nice. The only problem was the second or third question we were asked by almost every person was "How long are you going to be here?" (or as my sensitive personality heard "when are you leaving?") Turns out our ward is a bit transient. Many people are barely long enough there to receive a calling. We told them at least until the summer of 2012. They then welcomed us a bit more. Even though, it seems like people are pretty content with their friends... either that or we're not interesting at all, which might be likely. I've heard from all my friends that are married that when you get married you find other married couples and you all go on double dates and hang out and become best friends and move in next door to each other and have your babies at the same time and on and on and on.... well maybe not that extreme but at least up to the "hang out" part. The problem in our ward is not a lack of young couples. The ward is made up of young couples with a handful of older families. But like I said, no one is interested in us. Sure people say "hi" to us in the halls and when they pick up their little ones from our nursery class.. but nothing more.
Maybe I was delusional. Maybe you stop making friends after college. Or you don't make friends until you have kids or are in the PTSA or all your kids move out and you go to the senior center for a game of gin rummy... great I'm not going to make friends until I'm 65...
Seriously though, I miss having friends. I miss hanging out every weekend. I miss the group in Ellensburg. When Mark, Beth, Nate, Brad, Corey, and I were bestest friends and hung out all the time at Nate's corner house. When we would watch movies on the huge projector and eat Jack in the Box. Then when the boys got an apartment together and we would discuss what to do for two hours and hang out in the living room. When the TV was broken or taken or something was wrong with the living room so we all squeezed into Mark's bedroom and 5 of us sat on the futon to watch a movie. Or when Brad and Mark and I decided to go jump in Carrie lake at 2 AM, leaving Nate asleep in the living room.... Or all of our trips to "You-Blew-It" pass and General Conference. Going to all the branch activities together. I miss having someone to call when I wanted to go out and do something. The funny thing is, is that I married one of my best friends so I should be completely content. I am happy. But I need a friend. And if I've learned anything in my life, it is that friends are made, not forced, not planned. So even if it doesn't happen until I go to the senior center, I'll be grateful and excited for it.
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