Before we were dating at Yakima Fair
The day we were married and sealed for eternity
WARNING! You're about to read a novel. Sorry our love story is so drawn out :)
Mark Adam Norman
He is my best friend. He is the source of my happiness. He's my husband. He's mine
Mark and I have crossed paths a few times before we officially met. I visited Ellensburg a time or two before I moved there so I saw him a few times but we never talked. After I made the decision to move to Ellensburg I became more interested in the people there. I had known who they were from my previous boyfriend. That was one of the strangest things about moving to Ellensburg. I feel like I knew something about everyone and it was kind of awkward to meet people. Everyone had an opinion about me as well. Thanks to said previous boyfriend everyone supposedly "knew me" and "knew why I was there".... Little did they know, they had no idea. The summer before I moved I went to the Naegle's wedding. I met a bunch of people and Mark was among the guests. We didn't have a conversation but I remember seeing him.
Once I made the big move to Eburg one of the first things I did in town was go to church and that week our branch had an activity every night of the week so that people could get to know each other and have something to do their first week there (I was so grateful for that). On Sunday we had branch prayer in the evening. The presidency asked everyone to go around the room and say your name and something about yourself. People were going around the circle and when it got to Mark he said "Hi I'm Mark... and I'll give you a nickel to come talk to me!" I thought he was cute and obviously had a sense of humor so I decided after the activity I would go talk to him. After the prayer everyone was standing around chatting. I excused myself from the group I was with and went to find Mark. I spotted him from across the room. I made my way over there and as the crowd parted my hopes were dashed. He had his arm around a girl very snuggly and I could only guess they were together. My suspicions were confirmed by the girls on the drive home. I pushed away any excitement about meeting him and went on with my life.
A few weeks later there was an activity to go have a fire up in Lion's Rock. I rode up with Adam and Bethany. As the activity went on I was actually having a pretty good time. Then Adam came up to me and said I needed to find a ride back because he wouldn't give me one. He wanted to take a girl he was interested in back. So I told Beth and she said she would help me. Before I knew it Mark walked up to me. I'll never forget it. He just said "Hi I'm Mark, you're comin' with me." I got into the back of a hideous gold car and the same girl from that branch prayer is sitting in the front seat. She introduces herself as Val. Mark, Val, and I have small talk on the way down the mountain. Mark warns me that some people are frightened by his driving and if I ever feel uncomfortable to just let him know. I tell him I'll be just fine and we continue on our drive. I guess I spoke too soon. We went over a canal bridge going about 85-90 mph and the car gets air and then bottoms out. I immediately say "okay I'm uncomfortable now" but we were all fine and safe so it was pretty funny in the end. We head towards the Institute and Val asks me if I want to be dropped off or if I want to hang out or what not. I tell her I'm waiting to hear back from someone. We get to the institute and Mark jumped out of the car to talk to someone and Val and I stay in. I finally muster up the guts to ask her how things are going between her and Mark. She surprised me when she said that they actually weren't dating anymore. I was surprised because it really seemed like they were together and enjoyed each other's company. She then tells me that they just didn't have time for each other. I know I shouldn't feel it, but my interest is peaked...
In the next few months I get to know Mark. I developed a very strong bond with Beth, Mark, Nate, Brad, and Corey. We started hanging out every weekend at Nathan's house. Val hung out with us every once in a while too. Mark and I started getting closer. We had a very flirtatious relationship. It was fun to joke around with him and I knew he liked it. But it was never more that that. We were just good friends. I learned a lot about Mark in those first few months. I learned that he will drop anything and everything for someone in need. It doesn't matter who it is. I learned that he is loyal to his friends. I learned that he enjoys listening much more than talking. I learned that there was a side of him that he held secret and kind of hid behind it with charm and aloofness. I learned that he will be bluntly honest when you ask him to and sometimes when you don't ask him to. I learned that he would rather be shirtless. I learned that he likes to try new things and be adventurous. I learned that he was a true gentleman. I learned that Mark does not judge people, he accepts them for who they are and embraces them. I learned that he cared about people close to him more than he could express.
On Valentine's day 2008 our relationship made a huge transformation. In a bad way... Every year in Eburg there is a V-day activity and the girls and boys switch off each year planning it. That year it was the girl's year. I helped with the food and was late to the "activity" portion of it. The activity that year paired people up randomly for dinner by giving them a name tag with a 1/2 of a famous couple from history or movies or books. I was thrown together with a latecomer who wasn't even a member of our branch but one of the member's 16-year-old brothers. Lovely. It was super awkward and he ended up talking to the person next to him and ignoring me. In all honesty, I was relieved. I started talking to other people and Mark and I started in one of our flirtatious banterings. They occurred often. This time we had an audience. I can not, for the life of me, remember what we were bantering about but abruptly Mark says "You know this love train has got to stop sometime". I was felt like I had been slapped across the face. To this day Mark and I still laugh about this or discuss what he meant to say and what I interpreted it to mean. What Mark supposedly meant to say was "I don't want this to go too far. We have such a good friendship. It seems like we're heading down a road that could ruin it." I heard "Oh you silly naive girl! You think I'm interested in you?!?! How absurd! Nothing will ever happen between us! You need to understand that this is going absolutely nowhere. We must nip it in the bud this instant!" My jaw dropped. I turned red and I very quickly walked out of the room. I saw some of the people's reactions as I left and they had the same faces. It was humiliating. After that night our relationship changed. The flirtation was gone. I was very guarded around him and I was sure to make it a point to treat him as a FRIEND and nothing more. Years later Mark told me why he said what he did. When I moved to Ellensburg he was interested in me. He knew from what he heard and saw that (in his words) I was "off limits". I was still healing from a very bad relationship. He is not the type to take advantage of someone who is so vulnerable or lead them on. And looking back, he had so many chances to do just that. But that's not Mark.
I dated a guy I worked with for a couple months. It was short lived but while I was dating him Mark was so nice to him. Whenever I brought Jacob around Mark would talk to him and make him feel welcome. Jacob liked Mark the most out of all of my friends. Jacob and I broke up before I moved home for the summer. We had religious differences that were too big to try to make it work. The group was having a BBQ at Nathan's. I came a little late. Mark asked me "Where's your boytoy?" I told him that we broke up. Mark was nothing but a friend in that moment. He talked to me about it and let me talk and gave me advice. It was nice to have someone like him to talk to.
I went home for the summer and when I came back I was very distracted. I was narrowing down my options for a major. I was dealing with ex-boyfriends that I still had stupid attachments to. I moved in with my three best friends. I was considering auditioning for the dance company. It was a very busy Fall. Mark came over to my place one day and knocked on the door to my room. I opened it and invited him in. He plopped on my bed and I sat back down at my desk. I was writing a paper. We started chatting and our conversation went something like this..
Mark: I've been thinking. I don't like our relationship.
Me: um.... okay. I'm sorry?.....
Mark: No. I mean I feel like out of the group you and I don't ever hang out.
Me: uh huh...
Mark: Like you and Nathan always do stuff and you and Beth live together and you and Brad always laugh and stuff.
Me: yeah....
Mark: So I just want to hang out with you more.
Me: Oh! Okay! That's fine.
You see. Like I mentioned before I treated Mark as a friend. He was in the friend zone. Little did I know he was trying to change that...
Over the next couple months Mark and I did hang out more. We hung out one on one and talked more and texted more. We would go to movies or out to lunch or dinner. We would watch movies. I found it completely natural. It never felt forced. In December Mark invited me to a work party he had. (I can't remember if I've talked about this already... Sorry if I have) I went with him and it was pretty fun. There were a lot of people from the branch since he worked for an LDS-owned company. During the party I got a phone call from my dad. As soon as I saw who I called I knew what had happened. My grandpa was hospitalized a few days early. His health was getting worse and worse. I stepped out of the room and answered. My dad told me through cracked voice and tears that his father had passed away. Our conversation was short. As soon as I hung up the phone Mark has his arm around me and is escorting me to the warehouse so I can be in private. Then he just held me. He let me cry on his shoulder and by cry I mean uncontrollably sob with snot literally pouring out of my nose. Then he said "let's go" I get in the car and he starts driving. Not towards my apartment but towards my HOME. He was going to take me where I needed to be. When I caught on I stopped him and told him I couldn't. I needed to get things from my apartment and there were things I needed to do before I left for three weeks. But it was one of the kindest gestures. He took me home and told Beth. Beth and Nate were over and we all sat in the living room. Someone grabbed Friends on dvd because they know it's my favorite and we watched for a couple hours. That weekend Mark followed Beth and I across the pass. He was on his way to a wedding but the weather was bad and he wanted to make sure we were safe.
After the break Mark and I continued to hang out. One weekend we went to the movies. Mark and I sat by each other. Mark has back problems and has asked me for back massages often. I became somewhat accustomed to absentmindedly rubbing his back. I was doing just that while the credits were rolling. Mark leaned over to me and said "I think my feelings for you have changed" I said "what do you mean.." He said "Like maybe I don't want the love train to stop..." At that moment someone down the row had called my name and distracted me. My head was spinning. I didn't understand. He didn't say another word about it that night and I dissected those words for the rest of the night. I told Beth and she had mention a few weeks earlier that he liked me. I told her he didn't and we were just friends. She scoffed at me and said that he looks at me differently. That he likes me. I brush it off. That night she said "I told you!" I still don't buy it. A few days later we had dinner at our place. Later in the evening most people had cleared out and Mark and I were left alone. We started talking and I said "so... about that love train thing..." And then Mark started talking. He told me that he was sorry for saying that and explained the whole "off limits" thing. He told me that he has liked me for a long time. He said "We've been on a lot of dates" I say "What? When?" He then throws out all the things he had done one on one and I begin to see that I was blind. I had been so busy telling myself that he was just a friend that I didn't see he was trying to date me. It was very amusing. I was so confused. I could see myself falling for him so easily. But he was one of my best friends. We sat there quietly in silence for a few moments. Mark started smiling at me but didn't say anything. I looked back at him and asked him "What?" he talked about the things he liked about me. Then there was a silence for a few minutes again. Once again I asked him "what?" He told me that he had been fighting the urge to lean over and kiss me for the last 20 minutes. He took my smile as an invitation. When he kissed me it was different from any other first kiss I ever had. It was so natural. It was like I had already kissed him a thousand times. And we've been together since.
Ha! Not as easy as that! You thought this horrendously long blog was over! but it's not!! Maybe I should just write a book. Like the notebook... although our story isn't that exciting. And no one has Alzheimer's... yet...
So Mark and I dated. Our relationship developed very easily. Thanks to the two years of friendship it had under its belt. Our close friends might have had a difficult time adjusting to it but I don't think it was too bad. We weren't gross. We were actually told that we were the most tolerable couple to be around in Ellensburg. We should have gotten a trophy. We had some great adventures and some happy times and some sad times. We even survived me going away to be an EFY counselor for a couple weeks.
Then something that happened that changed our lives forever. Well actually a culmination of things happened. Mark's work as an HVAC installer guy had slowed down horribly. The economy was crumbling and he worked in new developments. House development halted to a stop and his 80 hour work week diminished to a 15 hour work week in which five of those hours were spent cleaning the work rig for the 7th time that month. Mark's sister had recently accepted a teaching position in Anchorage and was planning to move up there during the summer. She called Mark to check in on him and he told her about the job and she said the words that made me hate her for a brief period of time (don't worry Jamie, I've gotten over it and I love you!) "There are tons of jobs up here! You should move up here we have an empty bedroom!" Being 8-months into our relationship I saw this as a death sentence for our future. Mark wasn't sure at first. He prayed about it a lot. We talked for hours about it. He found out his best friend Brandon was moving up and he would get to share a room with him. I'm not sure when he had confirmation but it came. He started making preparations and he set a date. September 21st he would make the drive up through Canada.
The weeks prior to that were very difficult. I was hurt. I thought he was trying to run away from me. We would get in arguments about it. I heard people whisper behind our backs that "this was his only way out" and "I give it two weeks and she's back on the market". I was furious. But that date came. When I went to his house that morning I was not sure what to feel. I didn't know when and if I would see him again. I didn't know if we would stay together or break up. Our relationship was kind of up in the air. He told me he wasn't doing it to get away from me but how could I not think that. I hugged him tightly and he told me he loved me. Then we said goodbye and he got in his car and drove away. I sat on the curb for a while hoping that maybe he would turn his car around and change his mind. But that's not Mark. When he makes a decision and he knows it is the right one, he won't change his mind.
That kicked off our long distance relationship. I spent the next 16-months with a cell phone in hand at all times and on skype more than I ever thought I would be.
I visited Mark in November after he moved. That visit was a BIG DEAL. From previous experience I knew that reuniting can either make or break a long distance relationship. Some people just don't feel it when they see each other again. I was sick the entire morning before leaving. I was stressed out of my mind on the flight. When we landed I walked as fast as I could. I saw him beyond the security threshold with the biggest grin on his face. My feet wouldn't move fast enough. I knew we were meant to be together when he wrapped his arms around me.
We started talking about getting married and talked about timelines and when it would be best and if we should and where we would live and on and on. Our plans changed often. When we got engaged I wasn't even sure where we were going to live after we got married..
I went to see Mark for 10 days during my spring break. The night before I left to go home we went Northern lights hunting. We decided to drive as north as we could. We bought road trip foods and discovered the wonder of the Sunchip bag. It sounded like metal going into a jet wind turbine. We drove up to Talkeetna. We listened to music and chatted on the way up. When we got there we drove around the tiny town. CREEPY! Seriously, it was a bunch of small roads with houses at the end and we didn't see another car for quite some time. We found a little turn out on a hill above the train tracks that had a good view to the north. We waiting for an hour and all we saw was a little glow off the mountains. Nothing spectacular. Mark was getting frustrated. We started driving back and I started feeling car sick so we stopped to get some water at a rest stop. I started feeling a better about 1/2 an hour later. Mark and I read scriptures together every night and since it was getting late I asked him if we should pull over and read. We did so and then Mark asked me if I wanted to go take a look outside and see if we could see the river. We were right off the shore of a river. We took a short walk and then Mark took me to a part where the trees parted with a view of the glowing mountains and the moon. That's where he got down on one knee and proposed to me. I was more than happy to say yes :)
A week after his proposal Mark got an offer for a promotion at his work. A very big promotion. One that was too good to pass up. The only catch was the two-year commitment. After a lot of discussion and prayer we made the decision that he needed to take to offer. We moved the wedding date idea from March 2011 to January 2011 because we realized we were waiting two extra months for no reason other than what I thought was an expected tradition of being married on the 18th of a month. We were still looking at a 10 month engagement. I wanted to finish my degree. I had a quarter in a half left.
Student teaching, wedding planning, skyping. That's what I spent my time doing last fall.
After a very long wait the day finally come. Mark took me to the temple and we were married for all time and eternity. Let me tell you, after being apart for 16-months the words said about us being sealed forever, were the best I've ever heard. We never had to separate ever again.
And here we are now. Three months into our marriage. I love being with Mark constantly. I love spending time with him. I love the ease of our relationship. I love that he makes me laugh. I love him.
Here are a few things I've learned about Mark since being married. Some of them I love and some of them I am learning to love:
- He snores. SUPER LOUD. Sometimes it wakes me up because I'm lying on his chest and it is literally rumbling.
- He gags every time he brushes his teeth
- He has multiple laughs
- He loves British Documentaries
- He openly admits that he is the snuggler
- He kisses me every morning when I wake up
- He does not like water on the floor AT ALL
- If there is food in front of him, he will eat it, even if he is full
- He has a secret knack for decorating
- He sometimes sings the same song line over and over and over. And it bugs me. sometimes...
I can't wait for the rest of our lives to get to know him more and to let our love grow and grow. Mark Norman, you are my other half and I love you!
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